Transcription
[[Rabid and Rabish are in a convenience store beside the refrigerators. Rabid holds up a can of carbonated drink.]]
Rabid: 'This drink contains security features...'
Rabish: What? Why?
Rabid: Apparently to keep the BRAND IDENTITY protected at a HIGH LEVEL -- no sneaking off to the teats of competitors.
Rabish: How does it taste?
Rabid: Like a filing cabinet! BLECCH!!
[[Rabid has a curious expression on his face.]]
From Inside Rabid: WARNING WARNING PRODUCT DILUTION... DETECTED! ... WARNING... INITIATING CORE BEVERAGE RETRIEVAL!
<<Paf!>>
Rabish: Oh dear!
[[Rabid's body lies shattered and exploded on the ground.]]
Hovering Sphere of Cola: BEVERAGE PURITY AND PERFECTION RENEWED AND VERIFIED
[[Rabid lies in a hospital bed, reading from a soda pop can.]]
Rabid: "New improved Securibev 2.0... better taste! markedly fewer dilution-recognition errors!"
Rabish: Eh, give it a shot.
<<Glug!>>
Rabish: How's this one?
Rabid: Like... an EMPTY filing cabinet.
From Inside Rabid: DILUTION DETEC... recalibrating... END USER CONSUMPTION ROUTINE INITIATED. Thank you for choosing DR INK, now with SECURIBEV 2.0
Rabish: Phew...
Rabid: No kidding!
Rabid: Oof...
<<BURRRP>>
From Inside Rabid: ERROR... THIS SECURIBEV 2.0 PROTECTED DRINK IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THAT GAS RELEASE. SECURIBEV 2.0 PROTECTED DRINKS ARE ALWAYS COMFORTABLE.
Dr Ink: Try some... DR INK with new SECURIBEV 2.0... IT'S A BEVERAGE!